Christmas is coming up next week, and most of you probably think that good ol' ZS is running around like madman trying to get ready for it. Pshaw! You think that after being in this racket for this long that I haven't figured out how to prepare for it? I ditched that last minute crap around the same time that I fired those elves.
(For the record, it took a month to get the smell of burnt elf out of the house. The more you know...)
So what does this rotting pile of flesh do in the meantime to occupy himself? He indulges in a little fantasy fulfillment on the magic box. This year has been especially good to me, as the game industry has finally created a family classic that is honest about what happens during a zombie apocalypse.
While most of the commercials you may have seen for Left 4 Dead make it out to be a game where you and 3 other survivors (surviving what?!?) battle the legions of zombified souls, the real game message of the game comes in the playing:
In a zombie apocalypse, the zombies will win.
Four people against 40,000? Good luck with that. Especially when some of those 40,000 can leap through the air at record distances, vomit zombie attracting bile (smells like teen spirit!) or grab you with a massive tongue. Zombies don't have 50 foot tongues, you say? I think Mrs. Zombie Claus would disagree with you on that one- but I digress.
Crank up the difficulty to "Expert" and you will know just what the apocalypse will be like for regular people as you and your team suffer humiliating defeat after humiliating defeat.Just as you think you are about to reach your safe room, you will succumb to the multitude of putrid flesh who want nothing more than to run up, give you a great big hug and tell you how much you mean to them. And then eat your tasty brain.
Versus mode is also a great way for you regular folk to step into our shoes and see what life is like when you are different. The awkward phases you go through when you are a little overweight or you happen to cry a lot because your eyes glow red and you have a taste for flesh. This is like an afterschool special that you can be a part of!
Buy it, play it, enjoy it. You'll be a better (tasting) person if you do.
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